Monday, January 5, 2009

i think....

..... i am going crazy. somehow i am surrounded by superstitious people. wei! get a grip of yourself! all these are all self fulfilling prophesies! you believe in it, therefore subconsciously you expect these to happen to you, therefore when it happens, deep down inside you are secretly please that your superstitions are right. why not you put more effort in believing that you are a multimillionaire???


today is a bad day to come to work. soon blow his top to the extend that he shouted at lady boss. then he continued shouting and screaming incoherently at Finger... his rage gives me the impression like a Godzilla when on rampage, leaving a lot of debris behind. Anyway, i think he is feeling guilty now coz he ended up going out and buy a lot of tidbits to belanja all.... but damage has been done. everyone is kinda pissed and disgusted with him, altho the reason for him to be pissed was very valid. but the people that he went on rampage at at innoncent. he should be screaming and shouting at the correct person and not at us!


this whole soon incident kinda make me reflect on my temper. on how i behave when i m so damn fucking pissed that i cannot think and function properly. my only thoughts when i m so damn pissed will be, oh boy! i m so pissed i need people to fight with me! that's why i go on rampage - as well, looking for people to fight with so that i can release all my anger - which i know is really really bad. i m still changing. right now i've learnt to just shut the fuck up and fume inside or just walk away. but i still relapse to the old ways once in a bluemoon when i really snapped... i just hope it will not happen again.......


i had a weird dream last nite. of a hotel scene that has itt's system and we actually went online using itt's service and found out that the connection is not that fast afterall, i think it was still using the old ibis system.. 5.3 if i m not mistaken. of a guy whom i find familiar - whom i cant remember now that i m fully awake. of us being drunk and ended up having sex. of us feeling guilty after having sex. someone who is married / attached. who the fuck is he?? the dream was damn weird. one moment, i was the girl on the bed having sex, the next moment, i was the guy having sex with the girl and the next moment, i was a spectator.... i think i m cuckoo. or is my subconscious mind telling me that i m should really start practicing bi-sexuality?


Found out from LM that SV is back from UK for about 2 months. we are planning to meet up. i miss my old colleagues in itt :(

No comments:

Post a Comment