Reminiscing...

Google is really a very good tool to cyber stalk others.

I suddenly got curious of how is she. A long lost friend whom used to be the only person who gets me. Whom I had a huge row with and the friendship is gone.

I do missed her once in awhile. She is after all my once partner in crimes in doing crazy stuffs during college. 

I guess I really have a very selective memory. Somehow I am able to remember all the good fun crazy times but I can't for the life of me remember much about any negative stuffs except on how the quarrel started and the evil mean stuffs that I said without filtering in my head. 

Anyways, so I googled her name. And I found out she really have a child as I suspected from her now defunct blog. I also found out her partner's name.

I am missing her tonight and I am curious how her kid looks like. Should be super cute!

Anyways, I guess she must be very happy and living a very blissful life now and I am honestly very happy for her

**********

Yesterday was my dad's 9th month. How time flies. This year CNY is really very different. 

I can't help but to look back at last year's CNY where my brother came back. When my dad were in pain most of the time. When everyone made the effort to be there with him all the time coz we all knew he didn't have much time left.

I was watching Footloose 2011 remake and there were a scene where I cried like mad. Wren, the lead, were there the whole time when his mum got diagnosed with leukemia and he was there when she passed away. So he was having the conversation with the reverend on how death has it's own time and no matter how prepared we are, it will still take us by surprise and how he didn't have a chance to have a proper goodbye with his mom.

Me too. Honestly speaking, when my dad had his last breath, I wasn't at his bedside. I was at the other bed crying coz I was pushed away by his siblings and his wife. Coz they wanted to be near him when he dies. My last conversation with him was on the night of the GE13 and I told him DAP finally took over Kluang. He nods and smiled. The next day, he fell into coma.

But I am honestly thankful for having the chance to spend his final month with him daily. I am always thanking God for giving me this chance.

I miss him so much.