Truth to be told...

... I m actually scared shitless. :-) over what? My nose bleeding issue la. I've been having constant nose bleeding that is really very inconveniening my daily task! I've been to an ENT specialist before and he told me i m normal. But somehow deep down inside i think i might have some blood disease or something. Anyway, i updated my status about today's nose bleed, and my aunt, who is a nurse in usa asked the question that has been nagging me, do i have leukemia? I hope not! Though my mom's brother died of it... The truth is, i am scared shitless to test it out. What if i really have it? Do i wanna go thru the whole process of treatment and exhaust whatever money there is and die in the end? Ideally, if i have leukemia, i don't want any treatments. I just want to know how much time i have left and prepare all the paperworks and my funeral :-) morbid, i know :-) i don't want a cry fest funeral. I want it to be a party :-) a celebration :-) i want a non religious ceremony (see if u all can convince my mom or not la ;-)). No buddhist chants nor christian ceremony pls! :-) i wanna be cremated and all my ashes to be thrown into the seas. If possible, south china sea ;-) so ya, this is what i want should i die soon la ;-) i would also like to spend my last remaining time with ppl whom i love and hopefully can do more crazy spontaneous stunts and laugh our asses off la :-) that will be perfect :-) i know i won't have the chance to travel to the bermuda triangle :( but would love to go lor. I wanna see what's the hype all about! :-) i think i've spew enough nonsense :-) will get my blood tested la. Don't worry ;-)